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we can argue all day about the rights and wrongs, susan but the main thing is that we're out of toilet paper.
my neighbors got way too much time on his hands.
My mom: I want you home in 10 minutes / Me in another city
my computer started giving me side quests / An error occurred. The Wizard must be stopped.
me talking to the group chat even tho i know nobody’s gonna respond anyways.
me: in public. every baby: [stares].
me grabbing the ugly spoon to the guests and saving the pretty spoon for myself.
maybe if i tail this guy it will make the guy 6 cars in front of him go faster.
i prefer the original smart assistant. / i said, the original smart assistant. / perfection.
When you're presenting a project and you see a huge, glaring mistake
When you lost your phone in your room but can't even call it because it's always on silent
When someone meets me in person / It's even uglier up close.
When I see my friends having fun without me
When I host a party / PLEASE LEAVE BY 9
When everything is going wrong in your life but you're used to it
When bro saved your contact as "name + school" (I thought we were friends) / This Mother Fucker..
Watching my friend get his ass whooped by his own parents, while I got a royal treatment since I am a quest
Not wanting to get in, but once in, not wanting to get out / Shower / Bed
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