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Am i really a good boy or am i just motivated by treats?
5 year old me when i fall off a bike: ouch, good thing my helmet was on / 19 year old me falling off a bike: too bad that didn't kill me
Your cats won't tell you when they're plotting an attack but there will be signs
You ever browse reddit and see a post with too much text and just: Scroll
Why would he pretend to throw the ball? i trusted him. he's my bestfriend.... i... i don't know who i can trust anymore
When you're in a pillow fight and you pull out the memory foam pillow / Activate instant kill
When other people have their hands raised and the teacher calls on you
Watching spongebob in 2010: hates squidward, sees him as the villain / Watching spongebob now: / Squidward / Me / You and i are not so different
This is the real you. the rest is just parts and casing
Writing / Thinking up complicated stories with too many sideplots, a hundred characters and a theme song / Me
* Is about to admire someone & considers making a move * / The haunting feeling that i am not worthy of love: / I'm gonna stop you right there
Me / The consequences of my actions
The amount of liquid that i spill out of the bowl / The amount of liquid that i find under the bowl
That moment when you're tripping and you look up at the trees and realize just how connected everything is
Sleeping the night before an exam expecting to pass even though you've done zero studying
Personal stuff i'm dealing with and trusted her with / My mom / Me, embarrassed / Public conversation with family and friends
My bank account / Money / Gambling / Food rent bills
Me in my dreams vibing to the alarm going off for 1 hour
Me after finding a long hair in my studio apartment where no other life form has entered in the last 7 years
What does this mirror do, professor? / It shows us nothing more or less than the deepest, most desperate desire of our hearts / December 01
I don't like people / I spend some time alone / I don't like being alone / I spend some time with people
Human v 1.1 / Hotfix patch / Dislodged eyelashes will no longer enter eyeball area and become inaccessible / Random cheek and tongue biting issue during food consumption fixed / Memory leak patched, should fix the "enter room and forget why" and item misplacement issues / Fixed a bug where the motivation module would randomly fail to load
How's your diet coming along? / Shut up!
Finding a nice looking hoodie / It has a huge logo on the back
