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Me outside a bookstore knowing damn well i have a huge unread stack of books at home
Others at 2am: Me at 2am having a chat about existentialism with chatgpt
Little cousin: crying because he failed his math test / Me: don't worry, i failed math when i was your age and look how i turned out / Little cousin: starts crying harder / Me: yeah that's fair
Laying in bed: constructs perfect plot / Standing in shower: constructs perfect characters / While driving: constructs perfect setting / Staring at blank page: "wut r werds."
I went to bed earlier than usual / I couldn't fall asleep for two hours
Is that from chaptgpt son? / Essay i spent time writing myself / No
If you ever hear me breathe deeply it's not because i'm annoyed it's because i forget to breathe sometimes
I did this for my anatomy class a year ago and every once in a while i see it while going through my art folders and it haunts me / It's haunting all of us now
How it feels when you're 8 hours into what should have been a 30 minute job so you just sit there questioning the meaning of life
Having trouble opening a soda bottle? hold it upside-down whilst you open it. this will force all the gases away from the neck of the bottle and make it much easier to open
Going off to work each morning like / For money
I'm fat / Don't worry. I'll help you with a diet plan / 2 months later / Fuck
My brain everywhere else: works normally / My brain in a math test: Error / Could not copy files because no / Ok
Nobody / Construction workers at 6 am: Excited 300mm adjustable wrench noises
Always remain positive / Falls down the stairs: wow i got downstairs so fast
"Don't worry, you will get through this!" /
The situation I'm in
When its your favourite barber on duty and you dont need to tell him anything to give you the perfect haircut
First time transforming vs Transforming later in the show
How 6 year old me thought what the picture would look like if I traced my hand / How it actually turned out
What my sense of humor does
Online: Makes people exhale out of their nose and press an upward arrow
In person: Makes people question my mental health and send me to a counselor
When you feel less and less special to your favorite person and feel more like a burden
When you're stretching in bed and you feel your calf start to tighten
"When my boyfriend's dog drinks water, it gets splashed all around. So, I made a small garden for around the bowl."
Me: *gets dumped* / Friend: don't worry, there are plenty of fish in the sea / Me / The sea / The fish
