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Deleting all social media for mental health n then redownloading them 3 minutes later after getting bored / Peace was never an option
Cats don't even unstick their claws out of things anymore / They will just sit there with their claw stuck in a blanket and look at you like this until you unstick it for them
Video games in / 2010 / The game / Dlc / 2015 / The game / Dlc / 2021 / The game (v.1.07) / Dlc 1 / Dlc 2 / Dlc 3 / Update 1 engine / Update 2 engine cooling system / Update 3 transmission / Update 4 brake system / In-game purchase paint / In-game purchase air conditioner
A police officer working the night shift
Types of headaches / Migraine / Hypertension / Stress / Your mom calling and waking you up for no reason before your normal alarm
The page is loading / The page loads / You reload the page again just as it loaded
38.3k / Repost / 2 / Oc
Nobody / Me at 3am: where the fuck is my birth certificate / Marcus' Autism Journey
When you finally convince yourself to get up but the cat decides to take a nap on you / Well now i am not doing it
When you ask someone for the time and they reply time to get a watch / Edgeworth / You are not a clown. you are the entire circus.
When someone is trying to explain "simple" board game rules to me
When i was young i was poor / But after years of struggle, i'm no longer young
Weather during your entire beach vacation / Weather the day you leave to go home
Them: you are what you eat
Teacher: i hope you had a good summer vacation, where did you all go? / That one super rich kid: The world!
Sister: *pays me to get rid of spider / Me: *gets rid of spider / Sister: *pays me / Me: *puts spider back / Stonks
Now that we're in the middle of nowhere with no way to clean ourselves let's eat the stickiest snack of all time
Anxiety: aren't you like...worried? / Me: about what? / Anxiety: idk. / Me: oh my god you're right / 🙁
My vengeance shall be merciless / For my bowl is but half filled
My sleep schedule is so messed up, i feel like i am doing night shifts at my own house
My gf made me a cake for my 24th bday... / 24 / 23
Me trying to convince my kids this milkshake tastes bad so they won't ask for some
Me rapid fire doing these like i'm in naruto
Me at work wondering why i chose such a 'peopley job' for someone who can't stand people