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How i felt yesterday / How i feel today
Having a friendship with rare contact / Spamming insta reels
Bad guys aim in movies be like / The good guy / The good guy's shield
Artist in reallife / Artist in movies
And i thought the self checkout at walmart was bad...
My parents at age 20 / Let's have a baby / Yes / Me at age 20 / You are my only source of happiness
When ur squad can't agree on a date and u start attending your own plans because summer doesn't last forever
Every open world game summed up in one sentance. / Quest? I'm already on a quest!
Q-tips maker: Do not insert into ear canal! / literally everyone
When you're just starting out in the game but they let you keep the legendary weapon from the tutorial
When you have used all your lego parts but now want to build a new sick spaceship / One must destroy in order to create
When you ask advice online and a random guy helps you out for no reason at all other than just being kind / You are a good man. Thank you
When the barber asks how my haircut is before giving me my glasses back
When i'm too afraid to ask my boss any questions about the assignment he gave me
When everyone calls you lazy but in reality you're just burnt out and cant find the motivation to do literally anything
There are around two trillion galaxies in our universe, and here i am comparing dental floss brands to see which one is the cheapest.
Me spending hours looking at million dollar houses on zillow / My budget
Mom: Finish your vegetables and I'll give you a surprise / 5 year old me: Finishes my food where is my surprise / mom: see I was actually using an advanded technique called / lying
Superhero: i will never kill under any circumstance / People who died when the superhero punched the villain through a building
My parents at age 29 / Let's have a baby / Yes / Me at age 39 / You guys did everything to raise me / Now it's my turn to take care of you / We love you son
My phone using its last drop of energy to show an animation instead of letting me finish this call
My introverted ass enjoying my alone time / my mom / hey your uncle and aunt are here / come talk to them
My bed when i have to wake up for class / We're hitting comfort levels that shouldn't even be possible
I must align my feet with the tiles or else i will die