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Mom starts counting down from 3 / So anyway, I started behaving
Remembering the names of my acquaintances and relatives / Being able to identify and name literally hundreds of pokemon by sight
Wow I slept late. People must be wondering where I am / *Checks phone*
Me, watching book-based movie before reading book / What are they doing? It wasn't like that! This scene was completely different in the book! / Me, watching book-based movie after reading book
Me in the shower going from overthinking everything to pretending that water comes out of my fingers be like:
Me checking my bank account to see if anyone accidentally put money in my account / Sarcasm
Parents: Video game makes children aggressive. / Me after playing fishing simulator / *Aggressive fishing
Junior devs on their way to solve a problem:
My body / I'm raising the temperature to fight virus. / Me / So I won't die from high temperature, right? / I won't die, right?
How I really be feeling in the mornings when my alarm goes off... / I just can't.
Having +7500 hours in a game knowing all gliches and shortcuts / Speedrunners / Having 10 hours and beeing happy playing it / Me
Finishing up in the bathroom: / "Yeah, this is enough for the next person" / Next trip to the bathroom: / "Who the F**K?!"
Equipment used to make visual effects in movies: / Equipment used to make sound effects in movies:
Dude why are you growing a beard? It doesn't fit you / Me without a beard
Dogs people think are aggressive / Vs / Dogs that are actually aggressive
Creepy videos that will keep you up at night / Me watching in the day. / [laughter] / You dumb bitch.
When a person does fancy card shuffling in front of me:/Well first of all, fuck you smart ass/But also, can you teach me how
Wait, it's all flat? / Always has been / And other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
When you've been maintaining your garden for months and finally get to try your fruits you've grown:
When your girl's in a bad mood and she starts to take it out on you / I'm here to help. / Don't eat the help.
Me: *picks up scissors* / My brain: what if you stabbed yourself in the eye with that? / Me: / Shut up.
What I think I look like after working out / What I actually look like
The truth doesn't always set you free. / Sometimes it gives you crippling depression
The true reason why motherfuckers play with more than 1600 dpi sensitivity: