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My package arrived, unfortunately / Pikachu didn't survive. RIP
Me when I finally find the annoying npc that has repeatedly been shooting me from a distance
People rushing me. / Me doing things at my own pace:
When you hear a particular music / And it reminds you of a specific event that happened in your life
Mom: If you tell me what's wrong I won't get mad / Me: / No thanks, I choose life.
I need a strong bongo cat / I need a strong but calm bongo cat / Fucking delete this
Me and the boys in winter, exhaling air through our mouths to pretend we're smoking
Can't talk / Sarcasm / Can't swim / Can't follow a single train
Adulthood is when the dark circles under your eyes are bigger than your friends circle
When you're in the shower and get soap in your eyes / *Rinses the soap off* / Sector is clear. / *Opens eyes* / That one bit you missed / Not clear! Not clear!
When you're halfway through the argument then / You realize you were wrong all along
Your mother: "Pfft! I can cut hair!" / You at school on Monday:
When you see a piece of bread laying on the sidewalk/Pathetic.
When you replay an old game and realize it's the memories you miss, not the game
When you get a message from your favorite person
What is more likely to exist / An egg laying, water dwelling mammal that sweats milk / A horse with a horn in its head
Torrential piss / Fly on my toilet seat
The teacher uses your paper as an example / It's an example of what not to do
Everyone: Oh wow an alien! Can you teach us about your society's technology and the secrets of faster space travel? / The alien who studied philosophy and language arts and doesn't know shit about their society's technology:
When someone asks you "what's wrong?" but nothing's actually wrong, that's just how your face looks normally
Random kid: uhhh teacher you forgot about the homework / The rest of the classroom: / 2 Casually approach child / 4 Grasp child firmly / Yeet the child
Erasers: sacrifices their entire lives to make up for human's mistakes / Humans:
Doctors recommend doing a push-up, every time you die in video games / People who only play racing games
#5 One habit of intelligent humans is being easily annoyed by people around them, but saying nothing in order to avoid a meaningless argument. / Intelligence 100